Lack of self-confidence is defined as feelings of not liking who you are and constantly feeling bad about the person you think you are. Such belittling feelings can affect all aspects of your life, whether social, personal, or professional. People who are unsure about themselves often enter into a spiral of self-defeat where they lack the motivation to improve their looks, career, or status in life. Perhaps, the simplest way to break out of the vortex, and take the first step on the road to boosting self-esteem is to build a connection with a community as the pastors Garett and Andrea Booth at Grace Church advise. Being a part of loving, supporting circle helps you step out of the dark world that you’ve created around you and focus on other things. Soon, you’ll feel more confident and motivated to make critical changes in your life. Not sure where to begin? Here’s how.

Embark on a Journey of Self-Discovery

Experts in psychology reveal that most people who lack self-confidence often express their fears by picking on other people. In other words, they act like bullies by lashing out at others. When boosting self-esteem, begin by exploring your thoughts to understand why you feel powerless and scared. Contact a community elder or someone you trust and talk about how your feel. Then, make a conscious decision to change your ways. Stop any mean and hurtful thoughts when they pop into your head. Develop feelings of empathy, and try to be kind and helpful when you interact with people.

Identify the Root Causes of Your Lack of Confidence

Check out this article on the Entrepreneur that reveals how many people only lack confidence in specific spheres in their lives. For instance, you could be a contented parent with a loving, happy family. But, when you’re in the workplace, you’re constantly insecure about your job and achievements. Identify the particular causes that make you feel that way. Does your boss pick on you all the time? Are you given tasks beyond your capabilities and out of the scope of your duties? Have you been passed over for that promotion you deserved? It’s time to get proactive about boosting self-esteem by asking your boss for a job evaluation. If you think, there’s no room for getting ahead in your career in this company, consider other options in the arena where you’re appreciated for the effort you put in.

Ask a Friend or Family Member to Introduce You to a Community Help Group

The local community may have groups and congregations where people meet and connect over common interests. You may be familiar with some of the members because they live around your home. Get a friend or neighbor to introduce you to a group as an exercise in boosting self-esteem. Take part in any of the activities they do like planting more trees or starting cleanliness drives. Or, maybe, you could help organize fundraisers or bake sales. If you’re not comfortable talking to people, you don’t need to. Just do your bit to help in causes that will benefit the community. Focus on giving rather than receiving, and you’ll start to feel good about your life.

A study was conducted at the Canadian Institute for Advanced Research and the findings are released on Medical Daily. Here’s what they said, “Rather than fetishizing self-esteem, a much better and probably healthier and more effective strategy is to encourage people to have rich social lives and multiple sources of social engagement.”

Adopt Good Values and Righteous Living

Following the right path takes a lot of fortitude. But the principles you adopt will help you in boosting self-esteem. Speak the truth no matter what the consequences in your dealing with family or work colleagues. Always do the right thing that your conscience dictates, and be kind to the people who are less fortunate than you. Smile and appreciate it when a friend or family member does something for you. And, be transparent when it comes to managing monetary matters. When faced with choices, pick the right path and tell yourself – I am better than that.

Reach Out to People Who Need Help

Your community likely has many programs for helping the needy. Participate in them as well as you can. If you cannot donate money, be willing to invest your time and effort just as this article on Inc. explains. Visit sick members who need food and medicines, and babysit for families struggling with multiple jobs. Spend time with elderly people and help as much as you can by offering to go shopping or simply, reading and having a small conversation. The appreciation expressed by the recipients of your help will go a long way in boosting self-esteem and giving your life a sense of purpose. You’ll also have this sense of satisfaction and happiness that you’ve done your bit for someone without any expectation of anything in return.

See Inspiration in the Achievements of Other People

One of the root causes of a lack of confidence is often, making comparisons with others and their accomplishments. Learn an important lesson from Tony Fakhry on The Medium. Instead of thinking about how awesome your peers are, focus on your own achievements. Accept that you’re a unique person who has their own talents and skills. And, if you’re truly impressed, work out practical strategies to reach a higher status. Are you awed by a friend’s fashion sense? Pick up some tips on how you can dress better. At the same time, take a look at yourself and repeat – “I love who I am and I look amazing in what I wear!” Reiterate and condition your brain to believe it.

Getting back your self-esteem is a lot easier than you think. But it is up to you to make the effort and turn your life around. Believe in you and your capabilities, and there’s nothing beyond reach. You’re special! Recognize the fact. And, accept it.


Northern girl Laura is the epitome of a true entrepreneur. Laura’s spirit for adventure and passion for people blaze through House of Coco. She founded House of Coco in 2014 and has grown it in to an internationally recognised brand whilst having a lot of fun along the way. Travel is in her DNA and she is a true visionary and a global citizen.

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